Aimless
by LindRawr
Summary: And now here she was, exactly a year from the day her birth sake had wreaked havoc on the world. God, she had grown restless. She had selfishly, secretly looked forward for the day she would help end the world. As stupid as it sounded, she was vaguely disappointed that she wasn't even good enough to carry out the very task she was born to complete.


"**Sometimes quiet is violent."**

–**twenty one pilots**

**A/N:** So this idea hit me. I might just leave it as any open-ended one shot, but if you'd like to see more, drop a review. If I do decide to continue it, I'll need a Beta if you don't want it to suck. PM me if you're interested.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own the Teen Titans.

The happy was practically vibrating off of her in giddy waves strong enough to knock Raven off her feet. What the actual fuck is so exciting about cup holders, or double sided tape or whatever the fuck she was ranting on now? And they called her the emotionally unstable one. Starfire has always been the one Raven most wanted to put a proverbial cork on. If she heard one more rave about the "glorious" ness of opposable thumbs Raven might end up showing how glorious they really were. And in doing so she might involve a knife or sledgehammer or another "amazing creation" that needed thumbs to operate.

To say the least she wasn't in a good mood. Nor had she been in well over a year. The constant monotone of her life still hadn't managed to evade or adapt to the overhanging emotion that ruled this realm. She longed for a place where emotions were a one way street that waited patiently at the stoplight for others to pass. But instead she was still here dealing with Star's unbridled happiness, Rob's determined paranoia, Beast boy's ridiculous humor, and Cy's overbearing confidence.

She wanted to admit failure. Return to Azarath and stay locked up in some tower. But she couldn't. Not only had she been unofficially kicked out of Azarath, but she knew it would solve nothing. Instead she must live this life on Earth and serve it as a sentence. Only guilty of being born.

She had joined the Titans as hope to give back for her unforgivable crime. Here she hand-cuffed multitudes of villains convicted of nothing compared to what she would someday do. Then the inevitable happened. She destroyed the world. Only for it to be brought back from the flames that engulfed it. It was truly a miracle. She would never forget that day. And she would be forever grateful towards the other Titans for their naïve hope that had actually managed to save the world.

And now here she was, exactly a year from the day her birth sake had wreaked havoc on the world. God, she had grown restless. She had selfishly, secretly looked forward for the day she would help end the world. As stupid as it sounded, she was vaguely disappointed that she wasn't even good enough to carry out the very task she was born to complete. She had lost her- no matter how morbid and undesired- purpose in life. Three hundred and sixty-five days later and she still had yet to replace it.

No, she wouldn't consider keeping the streets of Jump free of scum her purpose. Only Robin had morals so gravely carved to hold that title. No lack of superpowers could make the boy wonder any less a superhero. She felt a pang of jealously at his so proudly chosen path.

Maybe it was her discontentment that made her head pound harder than usual. She was on her last wind when it came to being the Raven the other Titans had grown to love. Nowadays even being in the same room as the other titans at their calmest was too much added emotion for her. No, her powers wouldn't go out of control or anything of that nature. She had slayed that personal demon long ago. It was their content and acceptance that got to her. She couldn't stand to be in the same room with people whose biggest problem was deciding on pizza toppings.

On her worst days she wished her powers on them. She wanted them to be able to feel her lackluster and emptiness. Then she would snap to her senses and realize how selfish the very nature of her thought had been. She wouldn't wish her abilities on her worst enemy anymore then she would wish a new uncontrollable mutant strain of the black plague on them.

So instead she was left with no other option. She couldn't very well share her worries and pains. Even Robin was too naïve to understand how gut retching the feeling of no direction was. Cyborg would probably tell her to rub some dirt on it. Beast boy would make a bad joke, and Star would ask where this "wound" was so she could promptly bandage it. As uselessly housewife as it was to say, she had no clue what to do with herself.

And she was tired at standing around pondering life like some drop out philosophy major. Instead she came to the only logical conclusion. Her time here was done, and she was only causing old wounds to fester by staying any longer. The team could function just fine without her, and to be honest she didn't have enough selfless bones in her body to endure this personal limbo.

So on the day, the anniversary of the world's temporary demise, she packed a few things into a large overnight bag and bid the Titans, who watched on paralyzed in confused shock, a goodbye. And as the door slid home behind her something felt inexplicably right. She marched onto the world she barely knew with new found confidence. Maybe she still had yet to find her purpose, but she had definitely knocked one possibly off the list. Raven Roth was no Teen Titan. And with that inner declaration something unknown was lifted from her shoulders, leaving her lighter than she had left in years.


End file.
